Okay, I'm not this crazy, but I couldn't title my blog what I did and fail to post a reference to this South Park gem. Now on to the true rant.
Anyone who has met me knows I am not patriotic. Usually I could give two fucks about anything relating to politics, laws, injustices, etc. That being said, there is one thing that bugs me beyond words; people working, living, and shopping in America who are unable to speak English (haha, see what I did there?)!
No, this is not me being a grammar Nazi and pointing out the general populous' inability to differentiate between you're and your or there, their, and they're (although, this is another valid concern). This is in reference to all of the people who move to America and refuse to learn the main language. In case you haven't noticed, that main language is English. For all of you that say, "Oh, but by 2023 half of the population will be speaking Spanish." I don't give a fuck. Was the US Constitution written in Spanish? Didn't think so.
Don't get me wrong, I am a big fan of immigration. Or perhaps more accurately, I don't care enough that you chose to come live here. I love listening to some of your accents. They sometimes make not so hot guys so much hotter (wait, that could actually be another bad thing). Do what you want, just learn god damn English. It sucks when all I'm trying to do is stuff my fat American face with fast food only to learn that the person on the other end speaks broken English. I shouldn't have to explain what I mean when I say, "chicken nuggets."
I suppose being in the line of work I am in (if you haven't read any other blog post, I work retail. My primary job is training people on how to use their recently purchased electronics) I get a little more upset when the people that come in for assistance cannot understand me.
An excellent example is of the woman I was forced to work with for over an hour last week helping her figure out her recently purchased tablet. When she initially set it up, she put it in Hebrew. The first problem is that she wanted me to train her on an application I had never personally used and had no prior training for. The second problem was that she only speaks Hebrew. She spoke very little English so she could not understand me nor could I her. She was unable to even translate what the screen said back into English so I could even attempt to train her.
I was spending more time trying to communicate with her than any other of my colleagues would have, that much I guarantee.
After us going around and around trying to understand one another, she got pissed at me for not understanding Hebrew. One phrase she did know, "Speak to manager now." Cool, lady. So I am the asshole because you live in America and do not speak the language. How exactly do you think you're going to convey your message of disappointment to my managers who also do not speak Hebrew? Good luck with that.
Dammit. I think the Texas is rubbing off on me.....
