Yes, bitches, I am back! Sorry for the extended hiatus. Life is hectic when you move nearly 1,000 miles away!
If you don't know, I've moved from Davenport, Iowa to Cedar Hill, Texas. Crazy, eh? But have no fear, gentle readers, I stayed with my company who has provided me with such comical content up until this point. Also, the people in Texas have not disappointed me with their antics which will result in many humorous blogs to come. :)
The recent trend I'm noticing is how we are offering free things with purchases. Example: "Buy this TV and get this free blu ray player!" I never thought I would have to work so hard to give something away.
Now, I completely understand that often times the gift product is utterly useless. Currently, our free blu ray player is paired with a 3D enabled TV but the player is not capable of 3D. Silly, I know. But it is a FREE BLU RAY. Put it in your bedroom, tea room, what the fuck ever. It is FREE! Stop bitching.
One such customer attempted to tell me how he was going to cheat the system. *eye roll paired with audible sigh* Here we go.
Customer : "Well, if you won't just credit me the $299 the blu ray is worth, then I'll return it!"
Me: "Sir, that is completely fine if you do not wish to use the included blu ray player.
Unfortunately you will receive no refund as the player was free with purchase."
Customer: "No. On my receipt, it shows I paid for it! Ha! Your system will not know."
Me: "Actually, sir, as you can see the price of the television was discounted to reflect addition
of the free item. If said item is returned, the system will automatically return the television
to its original price which will not affect the price you paid. In other words, you will
receive no refund. Would you like to keep this player?"
Customer: "I guess, since it's free. Look for it on eBay!"
Really, dude? Do you think you are hurting me with your ability to post a player on eBay? I don't give a shit. It isn't costing me anything. Sell it if you don't want it! Use your free item however you choose. You aren't finally outsmarting me. You just made yourself look like a moron for arguing about my company's desire to give you something for free.
Have a great day, dipshit.
